Street Snaps: The Penis Bride, Seeing Red, And A Caption Competition!

Brides-to-be… oh, how they agonise for months, years, even decades(!) over THE PERFECT DRESS! Then the big day finally arrives… and their ensemble may not be every inch the epitome of elegance in the way they had intended. At least not from every angle…

Does she not look like a giant penis?!

Does she or does she not look like a giant penis?!

There’s some serious hat envy going on here:

"Well, I bought mine first, so I'm keeping it on!"

“Well, I bought mine first, so I’m keeping it on!”

What is it with garishly coloured hair, I wonder? I had a school friend once who dyed her long mane blue. She was 16, very beautiful, and it looked great. But why is it that middle-aged women are going for red? And I don’t mean the natural redhead look in an effort to hide the grey, oh no, it’s an all-out ****LOOK AT ME I’M HERE!!!**** tabasco sauce red.

Yes, I see you. They probably can all the way from Alpha Centauri, if there's any life. And their guns are trained on YOU!

IF there’s any life on Alpha Centauri, their WMDs will be trained on YOU!

...and YOU!

…and YOU!

Yes, lady, that dress would so totally complete your look!

Leopard Print – The Sordid Sequel

Do you remember this lady from my leopard print rant a couple of weeks ago?

Leopard print

Well, this week, I spotted her doppelgänger:

Leopard dog

I ruminated over this last one for ages, only to draw a complete and utter blank. So, I thought, I’d leave it to my very witty and inventive readers to think of a catchy caption. The guy sitting behind the bench, in case you can’t quite make it out, is actually dressed as a monk. I’ve no idea what he’s planning to do there.

Any suggestions???

Any suggestions???

That’s it for this week, peeps. If you’re a new reader and you want to catch up on the rest of the Street Snaps series, just click here.

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39 thoughts on “Street Snaps: The Penis Bride, Seeing Red, And A Caption Competition!

  1. Zyriacus

    Never understood, why women dye their hair in that ugly colour. Since most of them are already at an rather advanced age it might be some kind of “widows rust”? No comment on the bride nor the leomops.

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  2. Anna

    1-that bride does NOT look like a penis, but I know someone who needs to get some pronto!
    2-that doggy is the cuuuuuutest! in its little leopard coat? OMG SQUEE.

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    1. ladyofthecakes Post author

      You’ve seen too many mutilated American ones, that’s why you’re not getting it 😉

      Aw, that poor dog… it was struggling so badly to keep up with its owners, I thought it was about to collapse any minute.

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  3. linnetmoss

    Maybe he is a clerical Captain Ahab, praying for success before taking up his rope to lasso the female Moby Dick. Or just maybe… he is the Hidden Vaginal Valley in this gender-reversal drama (otherwise, why the symbolic chalices waiting to be filled???)

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  4. tobyo

    I too saw someone with that red hair of which you speak. I took a break in the skyways of St. Paul and one of the gals selling coffee had that hair! and these humongoloid glasses to match. it was quite the sight! but she seemed like a jolly soul so it’s all good 😉 love the dog with leopard print. too funny.

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  5. TBM

    Several things. Not sure about that wedding dress–can’t figure it out at all. Last minute purchase. Two: I want to buy a hat so the woman will give me a nasty look. Love the expression on her friends face. three: the dog looks much cuter than that woman. Four: no idea for a caption

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      1. TBM

        You know, sometimes you just can’t put words to an image. Instead, you just stare with your jaw on the floor and your brain is sputtering saying, what the?

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  6. pollyheath

    I guess she looks a little bit like a penis, but at least it adds a little something to a pretty boring ensemble.

    Also, that guy is obviously pouting that his Dungeons and Dragons friends stood him up (he even brought chalices for everyone)!

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  7. Pingback: Street Blues | Travel with Intent

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