Torture and Oral Sex On Toledo’s Terraces

Toledo has an extensive collection of torture instruments (just try googling “Toledo Spanish Inquisition”).  I’d admired them before, in a local museum, but now they’ve been given a public airing, presumably to scare the tourists. I took a couple of shots this morning on my way back from the opticians.

Torture instruments

Pull up a chair!

Pull up a chair!

Or would you rather have a little lie down...?

Or would you rather have a little lie down…? The headrest may be a bit on the prickly side.

You'd rather stand? Fine. Suit yourself.

You’d rather stand? Fine. Suit yourself.

Now that we’re in the right position, let’s get down to the sex part. So, the bar on the square outside my house is seriously trying to spice up its menu – see green flyer. You’ll have to squint a bit, but just in case you still can’t see it, it says “On our terrace: Oral Sex”.

Darn, it was yesterday! Tonight's titillation is boring old live music :(

Darn, it was yesterday! Tonight’s titillation is boring old live music 😦

Oral Sex Big

 

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67 thoughts on “Torture and Oral Sex On Toledo’s Terraces

      1. Kim G

        Depending on how old that café is, they are going to have to wait a bit before they can do it again. Of course if it’s a spry young place, that’s a different matter. But if the place has been, you know, around for a while, well, they’re going to have to make up with intensity that which they can’t manage via frequency.

        Saludos,

        Kim G
        Tehuacán, Puebla
        Where the peaks and valleys of the mountains have a certain allegorical quality. At least as it relates to my experience here.

        Like

      1. LAMarcom

        Kinda speaks volumes about our ‘Internet Culture’ and things we ‘pick up’ (no pun) on.
        Hehehehe.
        Heading over to check out that other post…
        🙂

        Like

  1. northern_star

    Hell, just one day late. Damnit.

    I was queasy the first time I saw the torture instruments, and now I feel queasy all over again.

    Like

    Reply
  2. freebutfun

    Lovely open air exhibition you have there, exactly the thing I expect to see when strolling around a sunny Toledo. Just as expected as the theme downstairs to you. Gosh, that city just doesn’t know how to surprise one…;) .

    Like

    Reply
  3. Kim in Fiji

    In Fiji they display a variety of war clubs, in Spain torture instruments. I wonder what artifacts of inhumanity will be on display in 200 years – land mines? bricks from nuclear power plants? roundup bottles?

    BTW, I baked a cake for you yesterday – you will get it on Thursday 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. ladyofthecakes Post author

      War clubs?? Do they have spikes on? Do post a picture next time you see one 😉 It’s quite tragic, really.

      CAKE! And I have to wait till Thursday??? And that’s a travel day for me… I might only get it on Friday… how will I cope? What kind is it?

      Like

      Reply
      1. Kim in Fiji

        Ok, will take a trip to the museum sometime and get the most authentic war clubs to post – one type of club does have a spike – super-ICK. And as for the cake, all I’m going to say now is that it is chocolate….

        Like

    2. Kim G

      The artifacts of inhumanity that will be served up in 200 years will be snippets of US politics. Unfortunately, they’ll be perceived as worse than the torture instruments. And less comprehensible, of course.

      Like

      Reply
      1. ladyofthecakes Post author

        I dunno… there’s gruesome stuff going on everywhere… but, I think, nothing’s as evocative as physical evidence of human inhumanity, especially if it has metal spikes.

        Like

      1. linnetmoss

        Hmm, I was hoping that since the Spanish Inquisition was made up of supposedly celibate priests, they may have used these belts on each other. Extravagantly wishful thinking!

        Like

  4. Expat Eye

    I would definitely go to that cafe – wonder if they have that in Germany?
    Love those torture instruments – I always take AGES in those kinds of museums! I’m sick, I know 😉

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    Reply
    1. ladyofthecakes Post author

      The museum is great – but I felt queasy for ages afterwards. If you were a woman, Jewish or gay, that would not have been good for you in those days…. not good at all 😦

      Like

      Reply
  5. heatherinde

    Oral sex? That brings a whole new meaning to “friendly neighborhood restaurant.” I’d probably avoid going in and out of the house after dark…. I’m not big on seeing genitals waving in the breeze. 😉

    Like

    Reply
      1. Jenna

        And then I had that song “The Inquisition” from Monty Python and the Holy Grail stuck in my head for days…..

        Like

  6. Pingback: ¡Viva España! El Cuarto Día: Toledo, Part 5 | And all the roads we have to walk are winding...

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