Nothing Separates A German From Their Sausage

Vegetarians of the world please avert your eyes. What follows is pure carnage. Of the most delicious kind. Let’s do the food porn first, and leave the educational bit (I am using that term very loosely) till later, shall we?

Currywurst is a legendary German invention... this one was devoured on a hike through Munich by the river Isar

Currywurst is a legendary German invention… these two were devoured my mum and moi on last week’s hike.

My brother and my mum beneath a sign in Munich advertising the most famous of Bavarian sausages: The Münchner Weißwurst.

My brother and my mum beneath a sign in Munich advertising probably the most famous of Bavarian sausages: The Münchner Weißwurst.

What is a Weißwurst, I hear you ask…

It's this! Actually, I don't really like them...

Here’s a pile of them. The while ones, obviously. Actually, I must confess that don’t really like them all that much… SACRILEGE!

And of course, you can get them canned

And of course, like any kitchen cupboard staple, you can get them canned. For emergencies.

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A small selection of a local supermarket’s sausage offering

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Those bits in there are finely sliced tongue, in case you're wondering

The chunky bits are finely sliced pieces of tongue, in case you’re wondering…

A seven-pound pack - now that would make for a nice afternoon snack

The seven-pound pack makes for a tasty afternoon snack

Now imagine this potential nightmare scenario: You’re at home, it’s late, you desperately fancy a meaty midnight morsel BUT YOU’VE RUN OUT OF SAUSAGE! If you happen to be living in a semi-rural area like my folks, 24-hour supermarkets or convenience stores are far and few between. What is a desperate sausage-dependent German to do?!?

Well, there is hope: My tiny little village of 700 inhabitants, which only has one restaurant and no shops at all, sports one of these:

YES! There is a God!

YES! There is a God!

The day is saved!!!

Just look at that shapely line-up…the day/night is saved!!!

By now, you’ll have gotten the point. Germans have a very special relationship with their sausages. Not only are burly bangers ubiquitous in local fast food outlets, butcher’s shops, supermarkets and vending machines, but they have also wormed their way into the common vernacular in the form of countless expressions. Here is a selection:

Picture the scene: There’s a terminal struggle going on. Everything’s at stake. It’s a matter of life and death. This is when, for a German, “es geht um die Wurst” (it’s about the sausage). And that tells you all you need to know about how we feel when it comes to our precious meat products.

I’m quite partial to the (British) phrase “I don’t give a rat’s arse!”. The German equivalent is “das ist mir Wurst!” (It’s sausage to me!). This appears to contradict the aforementioned “es geht um die Wurst”, but it’s really just proof that the sausage is all things to all people. (To all German people, at least.)

Some sad individuals love nothing more than to be offended by anything and everything. These bothersome thin-skinned types are liable to earn themselves the title of “beleidigte Leberwurst” (insulted/offended liver sausage). And while they stomp off in one of their huffs, they might well call the hapless culprit who (probably inadvertently) caused their latest grievance a “Hanswurst” (a buffoon).

When Germans get philosophical about the finiteness of things, they like to point out that “alles hat ein Ende, nur die Wurst hat zwei” (Everything has an end, only the sausage has two).

 

[For those interested in German food-related expressions, you will enjoy this post: How To Be A Hater With German Food Phrases]

 

 

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60 thoughts on “Nothing Separates A German From Their Sausage

  1. TheLastWord

    Yes!! What I need is The Definitive Guide to Sausages written by a German, for non-Germans. I don’t know German at all, not even a little German ( all the ones I’ve met have been taller than me 🙂 )

    So the Big Capital Beta thing is pronounced as an ‘ss’ or a ‘t’ ?

    My 15 hour layover at Frankfurt airport was spent pretty much running through the sausage varieties. Contrast that with my sister who spent 2 weeks in Geissen, ( I think ). When I asked her about she said, she replied “Oh, I had Pizza”. Gah!!!

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  2. Jenna

    I love that Germans and sausage are so intertwined, that colloquial sayings are about it – instead of being poetic about nature, or love, or something else, Germans can wax lyrical about intestines stuffed with ground meat. Now THAT is a true talent. 🙂

    Also, I would eat all of it. Except for the tongue.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. ladyofthecakes Post author

      The tongue is pretty good 🙂 There’s lots more expressions, my brother and I were laughing about it in the car today, as he dished me up some I’d not heard before 🙂 These were very Bavarian, though.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  3. Everyday Asia

    After being subjected to such an abundant meat-feast, us non-carnivores demand cake. Lots n lots of cake porn!! 😉

    BTW glad I stuck round til the end – just LUV the expressions!! Because, after all…. Everything has an end, only the sausage has two!

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  4. linnetmoss

    If I had not seen a photo of the Fleisch and Wurst Automat, I would have sworn it was a joke. Like those Japanese vending machines with 22-lb bags of rice, or live lobsters.
    Can we please go back to cake??

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  5. heatherinde

    1) A 7-lb. pack of sausage? I’ll have to keep an eye out for that one… as soon as I make some room in the freezer!
    2) I cannot believe you have a Wurst-Automat! I’ve seen Automats with emergency camping supplies, sex toys, and art, but never with sausages. Again, will keep an eye out.

    Hope you’re enjoying your stay at home! Was in Munich yesterday, but unfortunately only long enough to switch trains and bemoan the fact that I wasn’t hungry enough for my usual Munich Hauptbahnhof snack of a Brezl mit Obatzda. 🙂

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    1. ladyofthecakes Post author

      The Wurstautomat is going to take off… soon, you’ll have your own, you wait and see 🙂 Ooooh, all those delicious things you can buy at Hauptbahnhof… Café Rischart is my fave hangout

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  6. Kim in Fiji

    I’m not a vegan by a long shot, but masses of uncooked sausages look an awful lot like the organ that provided the casing…. gag. I think I’ll have to travel to Germany and try some sausage with my eyes closed to catch Sausage Fever.

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      1. BerLinda

        It’s quite the character description!
        He is “a half doltish half cunning partly stupid partly knowing enterprising and cowardly self indulgent and merry fellow who in accordance with circumstances accentuated one or other of these characteristics.” 🙂

        Liked by 2 people

  7. Anna

    I love this sausage obsession for all the obvious and non-obvious reasons. Here’s my German sausage testimonial: I wasnt into them! I had the currywurst – and the whole business of dry powder on a sauce is just WEIRD. I had several kinds of that type of soft-ish sausage too… they were all ok. When I come to Germany next time (Linda might be getting a visit mid-December) I want to try the hard, salami-like varieties (like in that vending machine #45, #47). Recommendations welcome.

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  8. somewonderland

    you’ve never failed to make me crave cakes and some other goodies before, but up until now I’ve thought that only ’em sweet things can make a real good food porn. Well, here’s to me being corrected – meat and all things wurst IS a great food porn, and it turns me into one huge meat porn addict. Now if I only could locate one of them awesome sausage vending machines… 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  9. joannesisco

    I’m not sure which part amused me more … the sausage has 2 ends or the sausage vending machine.

    This is where i have to admit I don’t eat sausages if I can possibly avoid it. I feel a shudder going up my spine at just the thought. Because of that, last year’s trip to Germany was a tad stressful when food was involved.

    Now I’m going to slink away quietly. I was never here 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  10. Kim G

    I knew I wanted to read your blog, but now I know it was in the wurst way possible.

    Saludos,

    Kim G
    Boston, MA
    Where the sausage-vending machine definitely struck us as a sort of “only-in-Germany” kind of thing.

    P.S. If live lobsters could be sold in vending machines, I think we’d have some here, but we don’t.

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